We have all been through so much these past couple of years in the world and so with the twists and turns of life we were inspired to write this song and get some of that grief/loss and longing out. Discover ‘The Oxford Drive Band’ with ‘The Long Way Home’ the 20th May in Formula Indie
We have all been through so much these past couple of years in the world and so with the twists and turns of life we were inspired to write this song and get some of that grief/loss and longing out. Discover ‘The Oxford Drive Band’ with ‘The Long Way Home’ the 20th May in Formula Indie
Marian says
I was 43 years old when I started singing in rock and
roll bands when many were leaving bands. At the time
I was a copywriter on Madison Avenue in NYC married
with a 6 year old daughter. What began to naw at me
was this sweet, funny articulate little person did not
know her mom loves to sing.
You immerse yourself and lose yourself raising a child
and that I knew but It seemed a perfect time to try to
bring back music into my life and to share this love
with Mia my daughter.
Maybe it was kismet but right at that time I heard
about this downtown group of people who had been in
bands at a young age now raising families and wanting
to play again or just jam with no goal in mind but just
that. My own singing background was in high school
and college musicals and then when I moved to NYC I
was a part of an off Broadway sketch comedy group
where we often sang as well. Singing in a band was
absolutely foreign
to me and when I auditioned I was completely lost in
how to sing in a band and hooked at the same time.
One band took me under their wing – one with mostly
women in it and at that moment I felt connected to
myself, more than I had in a long time.
I could not wait to buy a guitar, I learned how to play
basic guitar as a teenager, and share some of the
songs I was learning with my daughter.
As I began to play she closed her eyes. I got excited
thinking how great she is getting into the music. After a
few minutes she put her hands over her ears and said,
“Don’t sing mommy.” I was stunned and tried a few
times more thinking she was just hungry, tired or
just wanting to play with her toys. After many
attempts I realized she just didn’t like it. At that
moment I also realized it did not matter because
it was giving me so much joy and connection to
myself and other people.
My husband got in a terrible car accident and
life started changing in all these unimaginable
ways. Music became my sanctuary my therapist
and a way to express what I could not do in just
words alone. We moved to California for an
easier life when my daughter was 8 years old
and began playing with all kinds of musicians.
As life changed around me what was forever
constant was playing music. We played for joy
and connection and I loved recording as much
as playing out. I never played to make money
or have any kind of music career. I was juggling
enough balls in the air. I wrote about one song
a year that I liked and continued to grow as a
musician with other musicians far more
seasoned than myself.
Life moves forward and fast, my child was
growing up and my marriage was struggling.
At the age of 48 my husband was diagnosed
with being bi-polar II and was already
suffering from a chronic pain condition. At 53 he
took his own life. For years I did not play music,
could not even pick up the guitar and focused on
helping my daughter get through such a difficult
lost.
At the time I did not know I had put my own grief
on hold. Once my daughter seemed to be getting
on the other side of so much my world came
crashing down. She moved to NYC and I moved
to my own journey of grief.
I experienced depression something I had never
experienced before and walked in a fog for yearsdoing what I had to do and doing everything I
could do to rise from a deep place of sadness.
My mother got sick, she lived in New York and I
went to take care of her. I never looked backed,
left California and when my mother was well
again I went to Cape Cod, a place I had good
history with having vacationed there many times,
just to catch my breath, to look at the ocean. I
cried for joy on that beach and kissed the sky
every day as I slowly began to see myself
emerging out of the darkness. It was time to get
my music life back. So now I want to share our
music with more people, not for fame or fortune
because music has helped me so much in good
times and bad and if our music does that for someone
else how beautiful we can pay it forward this way.
